Give Me a Recording Contract, Please.

Today I was listening to the radio and I found myself wondering, how in the world did Kesha, I'm sorry, Ke$ha, get a recording contract? Her music to me is computerized crap. She even "sings" about crap. She doesn't even sing, she just talks. She wears interesting clothing (by interesting i mean slutty and outlandish) and a buttload of makeup. Give me a recording contract please. I can wear nutty outfits and just be plain outlandish and edit my voice to sound like a computer. I would have a nice life for doing absolutely nothing. Like Kesha.