Saturday, April 27, 2013

We Are the Only Species That Laughs

I never expected to be inspired, awed, and lifted tonight when I went to see Joan Rivers. She is really truly hilarious. Yes, she can be offensive. But I think this world needs to lighten up. Her off color remarks had me tearing with laughter. I got an ab workout during the show, better than any other workout I've ever done. And she recommends laughter as a workout. Who doesn't like to laugh?
You know what she said yo me at the end? (Not necessarily just to me but it felt like it) She said, "We are the only species that laughs." She's right. It's a gift we've been given. You don't see cows laughing. Or dogs. No matter what you may think. We are the only species that laughs.
Joan talked about her life. The ups and downs, the cruelness (idk if that's a word) and fabulousness of show business and just how hard it was to get to now. She is almost 80 years old. She's still going. But it wasn't all fun and games. It took her 7 years to get noticed. She worked on shows as a comedy writer. A woman comedy writer. Unheard of in those days. Even after she had established herself, she struggled. After her husband committed suicide, someone told her that no one would laugh at a woman whose husband had just committed suicide. She fell backwards. Back to being a nobody. Then E! put her on the red carpet and she spoke those fabulous words "Who are you wearing?" Suddenly, Joan was back.
She made fun of countless celebrities, even some people in the audience during the Q&A. I raised my hand and stood up to ask her a question but the microphone dudes never came to my rescue. I even had a crowd of gay men behind me trying to help. No luck. But she was inspiring. She reminded me of myself in weird ways.
She talked about how she always knew exactly what she wanted to do with her life. Show business. She called it "luck." She never had to ponder, "what do I want to do with my life?" She knew. And she said, once you know, put your blinders on and take that road. Don't worry about other people. It's your life. Live it.
She was fabulously entertaining and wonderfully inspiring. Not exactly what I expected from Joan, but exactly what I needed.



Sunday, April 14, 2013

Whoaaa Nelly! What a Great Idea!

I know I haven't posted in a while. I haven't been inspired. But today, I was inspired. A little maybe. We'll see how this goes...
I come up with these great ideas.
At least, I think they are great ideas.
I want a pet dolphin.
I'm totally against dolphins and captivity and all that jazz and if you're not, go watch The Cove. But anyways, it's a nice dream.
I could buy an ocean and put my pet dolphin Nelly in it. I would play with Nelly and swim with her and we would have a great time. Eventually, I'd have to buy her some dolphin friends but buying an ocean is going to put a dent in my checkbook.
I'd buy a boat so I can take Nelly for a swim like people take their dogs for walks. I'd put her on a leash and I'd sit in the boat and she could just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming swimming swimming. Not too far though because then I'd probably get lost and my boat probably won't be that big because ya know, the whole buying an ocean thing but whatever. And when Nelly pulls on the leash like a dog, I can yell "Whoaaaa Nellyyyy!"
This whole idea came to me as I was driving to Seaside Heights and saw all the boats in the marina before you go over the bridge. And dolphins are my favorite animals so that's my obvious pet choice.
I also like killer whales also known as orcas. My pet killer whale would be like Free Willy. A nice whale. One of my best friends really. I haven't picked a name for my whale yet because I don't want to get too excited if I can't afford him/her, but maybe a name like....Kim Kardashian.
I have a lot of other great ideas, like turning the roads into waterways and making everyone kayak everywhere. We'd all be in mad shape, but it would take a lot longer to get places. I also realize there's a lot of other holes in that idea. I'll work on it.
I can't remember my other great ideas. Maybe they weren't so great. Or maybe I'm like Dory and I can't remember things.
I'm going to start writing every idea down. There must be an app for working out great ideas. If there's not, I'm going to make one. What a great idea.